There is a chair next to my desk in my classroom. The kids dubbed it the counseling chair and I guess the name kind of stuck. If a student is having a bad day they can come sit in that chair and tell me what's going on without fear of reprimand, judgment or exposure. Note that I did not say that they would not have to endure a brief lecture or two depending on the nature of the discussion but it still offers them a safe place to unload what ails them. Throughout the years there have been many students that have sat in that chair and most have the usual middle school concerns but others just break your heart. The past week or two the counseling chair has been rather busy. So much so I was sure that there was a full moon. Yes any cop, ER doctor, baby doctor or teacher can tell when there is a full moon without even looking, people just seem to get all wound up and kids are no different. There was no full moon so I guess it was just an overload of hormones. I was a little overrun by the sheer number of kids needing time and attention these past few weeks and I was a little discouraged to be honest because sometimes there is so little I can do for my kids except listen and then I remembered the dragon story.
Years ago I got called to the Principal's office on urgent business. Even as an adult the walk to that office is a long one. I guess it was habit but I kept running everything I had done recently through my head to see if anything qualified for a formal reaming. Nope, not that one. No that wasn't really that bad. No, that parent wasn't too mad. So what in the world was this about? Nothing could have prepared me for this one.
It seems there was a new student. No problem, we are a military town and that front entrance operates much like a revolving door. This student was different however because this student's parents had a habit of suing every school district they had been in for the past seven years. Yikes! Ok, now I'm starting to see why this was important. Apparently the family was atheist and they felt as though their rights had been trampled at every turn. My boss at the time had put the young lady in my class because her parents felt she might excel in art and besides he said, "I can't put her in chorus because Lu is a preacher!" I guess he thought she might be safer with the Methodist. Anyway, I thanked him for the heads up and assured him that I would be on my best behavior. I would edit my words and watch my step. Now for anyone that knows me, you know that that was one tall order!
It wasn't long before the young lady stormed into my class and placed both fists on my desk and stated with some force, "Do you know who I am?" To which I replied "Yes, I think I do. I don't recognize you, so you must be my new student." She went on. "I am an atheist. I don't have to say the pledge of allegiance and you can't make me." I smiled and said, "I had no intention of trying." Her eyes narrowed a bit as if she were trying to figure me out and then she told me her name and I told her mine. She sat down, not sure what to make of me, not quite sure whether she could trust me or not.
Time went on and her talent became apparent. Ah, now I had some common ground. We had something to talk about that wasn't going to get me fired. I have to admit, I liked this child. She was smart, talented, and witty but she could also be extremely moody and withdrawn. I felt sorry for her. There was a deep seated sadness about her that made my heart hurt. She didn't really fit in and I am not sure that she really wanted to. She seemed to be a bit of a loner. I think the rest of the kids were kind of scared of her and I think she may have liked that a little. That wall she put up was there for protection, but that wall was no match for Lu.
Lu Phelps taught Chorus at the time and while Lu was not an "in your face" kind of Christian, she was a Christian nonetheless. When Lu got word of my new student and her sadness she went on a silent mission of her own. Lu started pelting this little girl with prayers everyday. Teachers stand out in the hall in between classes and Lu's room was just down the hall from mine. As my girl walked past, Lu would get real still and I knew she was firing off some prayers. I had told Lu my concerns for the girl and how I had to be careful what I said to her. Lu's response was "Well, we might be forbidden to talk to our students about God but they are helpless against our prayers. Watch me," she said, "I will pray for that child every time I see her." And pray she did. It was almost comical. I can still see Lu's scrunched up face as my girl walked by.
Now weeks began to pass and there wasn't much change with our newbie. Her mood was much the same but her artwork was fantastic! She was beginning to open up a bit more with me. One day she sat in the counseling chair and proceeded to drop the bomb. "Do you believe in God?" she asked. I took a deep breath and said, "Yes, yes I do." She tilted her head and said "How can you believe in something that isn't there, something that you have not seen or heard or talked to?" To this I answered "I may not have seen him, but I think I feel him from time to time and in a way, I have heard him." She frowned, "How do you feel him?" she asked. I smiled, "I feel him in the sunshine and when I'm outside. I feel him in laughter and sadness, in quiet and in storms. Don't you ever feel that there is something else greater than yourself out there, some far more powerful and positive force? I just find it hard to believe that this is all there is. The universe is so beautifully ordered, so vast, I have to think there is more to it than just this one human life." Oh yeah, I'm gonna get fired now, I thought. She studied me for awhile and our conversation moved onto other less daunting topics. A few weeks went by and no pink slip. I guess I dodged that bullet. Meanwhile, Lu kept shooting her prayer arrows in the hallway.
Then, one day I gave the kids an assignment. I told them to paint an imaginary creature and write a story about it. My girl turned in the most beautiful painting of a dragon I have ever seen. It was stunning! Then I read the story. I can't remember the story word for word, but I remember it made me cry. I will paraphrase it for you the best I can. It went something like this:
There once was a little girl. She had the best, most loving parents in the world. Her parents told her that there were no dragons. This created a problem because the little girl liked dragons and wanted very much to believe in them, but she did not want to go against her parents wishes because she loved them very much. So one day she went to her parents and asked "Would you still love me if I believed in dragons?" Her parents hugged her and said that they told her the truth. There were no dragons, but if she wanted to believe in them they would love her no matter what. The little girl went away happy.
So as I was pondering what to do to help my current students negotiate the trials of middle school, I thought about Lu's prayers and that gave me a great idea for this week's pay it forward project. This week and every week thereafter I will prayer for one student, per class, per day. I have six classes a day so that is six prayers a day. I think I can handle that, and I am curious to see how these little prayer arrows effect my kids and me for that matter. Regardless, I think Lu would be proud! :)
Laurie
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