I will never forget one of my favorite mentees. He was in seventh grade when I first met him and he was what I call a "floor watcher." This child was so shy that he walked through the halls trying to be invisible, trying so desperately to blend into his environment so that he might not be singled out or embarrassed. He mistakenly thought that he had nothing to offer, that his opinion was worthless and that his only reason for living was for the cruel amusement of his peers who liked to call him creepy or weird.
My husband works in the PE department in the same school as I do. He has a unique way of evaluating his students at the beginning of each new semester. It involves a simple game of dodgeball. The kids love dodgeball and I can certainly see why. Talk about a way to relieve stress! Nothing like pelting a ball at someone who has been giving you a hard time all week to put a smile on your face. Now these balls are specially made for the sport and are extremely soft so there is no real harm done. I think it is just the simple fact that you get to toss a ball at a fellow peer and not get in trouble. Hmm, maybe I should join a dodgeball league. :) Anyway, Michael has the kids play the game at the end of the first full week of school so he can see what kind of people they are. Michael says that nothing tells you more about a person's character than a good game of dodgeball because it's what you do when you think no one is watching that really matters. You see if a kid gets hit with a dodgeball he is suppose to sit down, but many students will take a few quick glances around to see if anyone saw them get hit before they decide whether to keep playing and see if they can get away with it or sit down and play fair. Now these kids think that no one is really paying attention, but after a decade or so of teaching, Michael and the rest of the PE staff are trained to see out of the back of their heads, corner of their eyes and upside down if need be and you can be sure that they know when a kid gets hit. They all watch to see if he/she sits down, not so they can correct them but because it tells them so much about the child's character.
Michael came to me one day with a name for the mentee list. He told me that he wanted to take on my "floor watcher" as a special project. "This boy," he said, "could be a great athlete if he could only get his confidence up. He is a good kid," Michael told me. "He just needs some encouragement. He is in your art class, would you keep an eye on him and work on his self esteem a bit if you get the chance?" I nodded, "Sure," I said. "In the meantime," Michael went on, "I am going to see if I can get him interested in football. This kid really needs something that he can be good at and he is as strong as an ox. I think he will make a great football player." I stopped him as he was leaving. "Hey," I said. "Did he pass the dodgeball test?" Michael grinned. "With flying colors."
So Michael set about working on his project. He got the boy in the weight room and watched as he quickly and quietly excelled. He got him on the football field as well and let's just say he had found his sport! He loved the game and slowly, carefully with the coaches constant encouragement, he began to come out of his shell.
I can remember the first time I saw him his eighth grade year. Weight training combined with a good little growth spurt had transformed this once shy, awkward "floor watcher" into a confident and strong young man, but the thing that really stood out for me was the way in which he carried himself. He walked into my class that semester with his head held high. My heart jumped for joy! What a difference a year had made! Actually what a difference a year, lots of food, some hard lifting and an inspirational coach had made. :) Somewhere near the end of his eighth grade football season this boy's dad who was so proud of his son's success, found Michael and thanked him for what he had done for his child. He told him how glad he was that Michael had talked him into playing football and how much it had helped his son's self esteem.
Michael and I ran into this young man a year or so ago and he was working his way through college. You could tell by the way that he talked with the people he was working with that he was a different kid than the one I remembered all those years ago in seventh grade. He was bright, talkative, almost outgoing even and extremely glad to see his middle school football coach. He had continued with football in high school and was very successful. It gave him an automatic peer group and helped to keep him on the right track. And to think that he might never have even tried the sport if not for the coaxing of one persistent PE coach that took a special interest in him.
Michael and I recall that story from time to time to remind ourselves why we do what we do. So many other jobs pay more financially but this job has it's own form of currency. We get paid every time a kid makes it by beating the odds, developing his self esteem, or by discovering his true value. It's a good pay check and although it might not buy me a new car, it pays pretty well.
For this weeks pay it forward project I decided it was time to recommit to my mentees this semester. While I have done my best to check in on them, I have not taken it to the level that Michael did with his special project. I have been so busy with all of the regular classroom stuff. Sometimes it is easy to forget why I'm really here. I need to go the extra mile because I think about what might have become of that boy if Michael had not taken the time to really encourage him. I shudder to think that this talented, bright young man might still be a "floor watcher" and what a horrible waste that would have been. So this week I'm on the prowl for "floor watchers." Time to seek one out, dust 'em off and help them discover some hidden talent. I am long over due for another good pay day!
Laurie
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